You'll find heaps of those three steps to becoming a good programmer recipes on the web, but believe me: they're all wrong!

Becoming a good programmer actually takes five steps, presented here as a world premiere exclusively for my (two) readers:

1. Start by being a great programmer.
2. Drink too much beer.
3. Sleep too little.
4. Watch lots of TV.
5. Leave Windows open for too long.

Results are guaranteed.